A Poem...

I wrote this poem tonight. It was refreshing. I hadn't written any poetry in the past month. When I think about it, poetry is the art that most soothes my soul--reading it and writing it. I love music, but I think it's so much more beautiful when language alone can achieve emotions without music to lead the way. Anyway, writing this got a lot off my mind.

“Over Coffee in Late January”

She met me for coffee before she left.
She had just gotten her new glasses
and asked me how they looked on her.
Of course, I thought she was beautiful.

I thought her beautiful in braces,
I think her beautiful in glasses,
someday I will think her beautiful
in the wrinkled and gray veil of age.

There was plenty of conversation,
but none that scratched far below
the surface. The words were there,
but I was too scared to let them free.

A beautiful woman now sat by me
in place of the girl I’d come to meet,
and across from her still sat a scared
little boy, where a man should now be.

I wanted to tell her what was going on
inside the depths of my beating heart,
but all I could do was talk about weather
and school and other trivial nothingness.

Why on earth did I still fear the same fears
that crippled me in the days of my youth?
Was I not strong enough to be rejected?
Was I not too resilient for heartbreak?

Yet, so many times have I felt this way
for this same damn girl that sits here now.
Every time before has ended in my tears.
Why should this time have been different?

In the end, I found the risk unworthy.
I would not gamble with my own heart,
even though I knew that I’d come to regret
it. I got in my car and drove home safely.